Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Why was my mind locked?

Today I completed six months in this blogsphere with over 6000+ hits. These six months have been the toughest time of my life. With times me being just a click away from deleting this blog and other time I love it that I think how will it be a few years from now.

The good feeling is because of all the care I get from my fellow bloggers and the way I can express my self here which sometimes you can’t even speak to your friends about. The bad is that I feel most of the time that the blogsphere world is no different than our normal world. I feel people are not real with what they write and that’s where I felt the purpose of blogging drops.

Correct me if I am wrong aren’t we supposed to express our feelings here openly whereas most of the time I feel that bloggers are pretending to be what they are not. I don’t mean all of you but still a few around us are which makes me feel if I have to meet the same people in real life why am I getting into another headache of meeting the same people here.

Honestly I blog to let my true feelings out. It’s like an online diary to me where I can express freely and openly. I am here because from my busy life when I move around the blogs on my list I feel relaxed after reading Chika’s hatred for men, grey’s ranting to Blue’s simplicity so all of you there have something special in you that makes my day at the end worth smiling.

Lately as many of you know what I have been through. I did enough nagging about it and I just feel today is the end of all that nagging. I am a normal person; I want to live as for who and what I am not; not to cry for who has left me! What ever has happened is my past. Remembering it I can’t live my future or present. It just was eating me day and night. These thoughts literally had blocked and locked my mind and the sense of thinking further.

The first step is to kill my identity. Amu is dead as of yesterday (Allah yer7ama). Why did I kill this identity? This name was given to me by her. I don’t know how it came but it was there as long as I was with her. I loved it till then but it’s hard to live with it!!

My new identity is Speedo and that’s because everything in my life has something to do with quickness or speed. From my work to my daily life, from me being typical guy loving sports cars, motorcycles and speed boats.

Speedo

21 comments:

'Grey' said...

lol ! Speed ... why dont you let go of the O ...(Speedo is a underwear brand they might sue you).... Im glad you have started new journey ! Many good things will be on the way !

Zed said...

hehe thats exactly what i was gonna suggest

or use FLASH, BLINK or anything indirect

speedo just sounds gay

chikapappi said...

GREY!! ZED! What's wrong with Speedo!! Come on!! it's catchy!! AMU - SPEEDO, give it a try... ask the girls, we are outnumber men dear ;) o ba3dein I hate men you dimwit!!!! Huh!!! ok okkkkkk

Speedo said...

grey: I think it look fine..

zed: sounds gay :/ welcome here :)

chika: I will..girls your suggestions plzzz

chikapappi said...

i have mistakes bel comments!!!

Speedo said...

chika: ay mistakes?? I am blind even after having hour eyes..

'Grey' said...

Amu . don't listen to Chika ! you will be sorry !

Amethyst said...

Congratulations.

chikapappi said...

Grey.. why?! But I offer help & I come in peace "angel blinking face"

Speedo said...

grey: chika my right hand and you my left I have to listen to both of you :) but as right comes first I have to listen her this time :p

amethyst: thanks!

chika: *blinks twice*

chikapappi said...

Grey, we have to take this matter outside - after 5 @ Marina parking!!!

Speedo said...

chika: lolll am I invited as this conversation is being held on my blog :P

Pearls said...

allah i like the new theme !!:P

Ra7aLaH said...

love the new attitude!!!! SPEEDOOO is a better person!

Desert-Roses said...

3ad wallah today when you post for me a comment I began to wonder why he changed his screen name?....

I like to share my expereinces with ppl...but first let me to tell you that this is very interesting article...hon...

So far all the ppl I met are honest...no let me correct all the ppl that I had considered as bloggers for me...worthy to read thier blogs..I am as you new comer..I was seeking smart people because my conception about ppl has changed recently...so far all of my boggers are true...am not sure 100% but 90% ma7ad perfect...well..your one of my bloggers..and your honest..

Answering ur question are ppl here as in real life?...maybe not..you will sense a difference...like I ...I have a baby face o na'9ra emtan7a as I call it...o kella seems that i know nothing...well..this is just how i am..but When I get to write I feel different...there is another inner me..so akeed if u see me in real life you will say..hathi ehi?

What I respect in you is ur courage...despite all of ur inner fears...u fear but you're not afriad to tell..I think I told you that in a previous post...

Other people are smart and lost, they don't know who they are...they know something wrong..out there, in the world they live in, they find crazy people and as non-insane person who lives between insanes..he try to manipulate what he is to fit in..yetkayaf..so what aabout someone who lives in a crazy world and will die in...akeed he/she wants to find a shelter...they need to dream..maybe some escape thier real wrold and come here...

wallah 7adi endemagt..lol..anyways you got what I am saying??

Navy Girl said...

hey where did you take my bro amu !! ;P

maby speedooooooooo liked amu better lot shorter :P

i told you once & i'm telling u again .. its not worth it .. no one is ..

bb q8 said...

at last... you're letting the past go! mabrook! all the best for your future!! :)

:::: SHAYOUMA :::: said...

Speedooooo I love the name!!!

Purplecious said...

WELCOME Speedo

ROOOOOOOOOOOOO7

;)

Speedo said...

pearls: thanks :)

ra7alah: hope soo..

desert-roses: I got it..thanks for the sweet words:)

navy: amu was never your bro :@ he is dead now :pPp

bb_q8: holding on to it will just make things bad..

shayouma: thanks..

purplecious: hehe..thanks :)

Canc3riaN said...

Hey you know what's interesting ba3ad? Those people who actually create a blog where they MAKE UP every single story and they live a different world.... :S I just don't get it.

Okay you know what maybe that's their way of feeling better..

but hmmmmm... isn't it interesting how people act?

And by the way... it's amazing that you're having a new start! :D