Am I Ready For This?

Well I am getting engaged soon...

To who? I don't know...
Have I seen the girl? No
Do I care? WHATEVER....

So my dearest mother has finally seen a girl for me. She likes her and wants me to see her. According to her the girl's family likes me as she has already spoken to them and all I need to go to her house talk to her for few minutes and say 'YES' and there she will be my soul mate. I have never been to any house before and I find it really frustrating to know that I have to wear this and behave in this way like what more matters is the way I look.

I don't know if I am ready for this big step but my friends think I am doing wrong. I have nothing to say on this as I am tired of 'girl - o - sphere'. I have always wanted this big step to come with my wish but after so much of hard luck I have given up all hopes and just to see my parents happy I am doing it the way they like it.

I am too scared. I hope it all goes well and keeps everyone happy.

Wish me luck and need your prayers!


:::ShoSho::: said…
I wish you all the best,, you have been through alot.. Trust me marriage happens when we don't expect it. Mine was an arranged one but I knew him, he's family and I am happy..

but for you, who knows, she could bethe ONE.. bas if after you feel not, you should tell your parents how you feel but calmly..
Anonymous said…
shosho: thanks :)
SpiKeY said… believe in fate?? coz if you do..then if she is the one..then ....its fate...

good luck man :)
Zi-One said…
awal shay ma tshoof shar oo salamat ;) thanii shay i think ena etha u didn't like her ;s la ta5eth-ha oo tebtelesh feeha y3nii el3ela8a ra7 t9eer 5aysa oo malha da3i, mo lazm ta5eth awal wa7da omek tnageeha 3adi ra7 tdawerlek '3airha ;p .. bs etha u do like her 3yal allah ywafgek ;D
Anonymous said…

I hope ena kel shy yekon more than ok !

yes .. I guess u r ready ! and the fear is normal .. It's getting married .. not buying a new bike thingy !

best of luck !
Anonymous said…
spikey: I do and I think if its meant to be it will happen! thanks :)

zi-one: got it :D

cat: thanks :)
Lala* said…

why don't you meet the girl first and see how that goes?

Ask for more time with her, then tell ur mom to get you her number, talk to her o0 shoof etha feeh qobo0l or not..

don't rush into anything.. Oo Allah ykteb ma feh elkhair..

Best wishes to you, bro***
Anonymous said…
Well if you and your mum are good judges of character than alright but first impressions are often misleadind , did i scare you yet ?

Good luck and allah yaster
Deema said…
well i always wanted this event to please both families the most, for this is the way it goes in kuwait. so it depends on your very own skills and intuition to understand the concept of a person pretty fast to say the first yes, yet there is a longer time to decide that you shouldn't miss.

but it is logic that cannot always be the reason for marriage. i think it is the longest ceremonial event :) includes belief and love, belief is sometimes missed with logic.

but be yourself, ok lets face it :P you should look good! (and since you're a leo, looking good is in your blood ;)) but the dialog can have the greatest deal of the decision making. and you will know it once you meet her :)

good luck wayed :D

and about being ready or not: you should experience this!!
naming it an experience has a nice effect while working on it :)

sorry for the long comment

bestest wishes
Anonymous said…
lala: I believe meeting the girl doesnt shoes who she is? I always call the initial period the honeymoon time as both sides are ready to show their good sides only ..thanks for the wishes :)

greyshorts: Na gone are the days..:D..thanks for the luck I need that!

Deema: Do you know this is the longest one and does make a lot sense to me..It cares that you read it well..So what I have decided is if its meant for me it will happen so going with the flow is the best option :) thanks for the wishes!
outkasty said…
LOOOL! 6om6om6om6om6om6om6om6om min awwwwwwal ma kitabt [ ] GAMAW IL-AWADEM YENKHA6BOOON AW YAKH6EBOOON =~~~~~~~~~~~~]
Anonymous said…
outkasty: loooooooool
shoosha said…
alot of ppl got married this way oo mafeehum illa il 3afya and their living a happy life.. faa i say take that leap! sit with the girl and talk to her, minta khasran shay...
goodluck ;)
give us details ba3dain ;p
Anonymous said…
shoosha: sure details coming soon!!! thanks for the luck!
bb q8 said…
WOW!! this is just what you needed! Mabrook! All the best...
Shoush said…
If u r doing this just to make ppl around u happy then this will be a big mistake u will live ur life regretting. However, u shud go c her and giv her a chance. She mite afterall be a desent girl and u 2 mite end up getting along and all. I just think u shud slow down a bit. U don't say yes min awal mara. These things take time. And it's a life-long commitment ur talking about. Am all with respecting ur parents and wanting to see them happy, but not on the expense of ur happiness and the girl's future. Don't just say yes to please ppl around u. Be sure this is wat u want. Think hard about it before making ur decision. See her once twice watever it takes. Oo 9al 9alat ilisti5ara before u make ur final decision.

Allah ywafgik inshala.
Pinky said…
Wow! What a big few weeks you've had! Whatever you choose to do make sure you are happy and that you've thought it through.
Good luck!
OutOfReach said…
wish you the best :)
I agree with shosho you should go see the girl nothing wrong with she might be the one :) but if you feel differently tell your family dont do it because they are happy about it ...
good luck :D
hey take it easy,, i know its hard you will be on the spot but remember she feels the same way too :P so take it easy be yourself o0 allah ykteb elli feeh el 5eer :)
mm men zeman ma 9aar 3ndna 3res or melcha abii arooooooooooooooooo7 3res lol
SHISH said…
Good luck , and i hope everything is going great with u :)


allah yawafgk inshallah
Enigma said…
Well congratulations! Just make sure not to rish this thing. This is a huge step you're taking and if you're going to be with someone for the rest of your life make sure you have a lengthy engagement period to get to know them better.

GOod luck!
Anonymous said…
Wow. It can happen that fast, with that little input from you? You must really have a lot of trust in your mother, and your mother must know you really well.

Does your Mom know about your previous relationship, and how you still yearn for her? When you get engaged, are you obligated to share any of that information with the woman who is going to marry you? I am sorry to be so snoopy, I just don't understand how this all works.
FourMe said…
Not going to sugar coat it, I think its a mistake and way tooo soon.. What do you mean you don't care and its ok cuz it makes your parents happy! Its your life and you're the one whos gona have to sleep next to this woman for the rest of your life, so I think you should care a little bit more..

Fair enough go see her, but don't agree on the spot, thats not fair to you nor the girl..

Anyhows wish you best of luck..
Ms Loala said…
Well, before going to her house you should ask yourself couple of questions:

1- Do i REALLY want this and not just to make my family happy?
2- Am i ready to support a wife and kids?
3- Do i have this URGE inside of me to get married?

Think of those while sitting all by yourself and not be influenced by your parents and then decide whether you're ready or not. Because if you're not ready and just wanna get married just to please your parents 3ayal shthanb el bnaya? ehee eb te6aa3 men bait oboha wetro7 bait rayelha. Therefore, she'd expect you to be ready.
'Grey' said…
Life is what happens to you when your are having other plans ( in your case when you are not having other plans)... I strongly believe in that. If you are destined to marry this girl you will. Whether you will love her that is upto you. Its a HUGE decision , Get to know her first . May be she's the ONE :)
Anonymous said…
bb_q8: thanks :)

shoush: thanks for the advice I will pray 9alat ilisti5ara before I decide :)

pinky: tell me about it...its been one roller coaster days! thanks for the luck :)

outofreach: 7ayach I am sure mom will need a few good dancing girls :D I will give it a thought but I have nothing specific that I am looking in a girl!!

shish: thanks and ajma3een enshallah

enigma: thanks thanks thanks :D

intlxpatr: I know thats too oo oo fast!! All my family knows about my previous relationship but they pretend as if nothing happened!! I am not obligated to share any information. It all depends how much she wants to know about me and tell me about her past :) sure you can ask more Q's..:)

fourme: nice to see ya here...I hope it goes well!

rhombus tigress: Which way you wanted?

ms loala: the answer is
Yes I want it not for my family but for me!
Yes I am ready to support family and 1 kid :)
I do have the urge!!

grey: I agree :)
Amethyst said…
Good luck! Think positive, it might work out.
GE&B said…
If it's meant to be it will! Don'y rush into anything. Remember: ('m speaking from experience here)
1) she's waaaaaaaay more nervous than you are.
2) Say something. (ANYTHING. she's likely not paying much attention)
3) Trust your heart and take things slooooow. (don't have anyone guilt-ing you into anything...)
4) Take a deep breath.
5) and for goodness sakes '3atir o wear closed shoes.
Navy Girl said…
your not serious are you ? listen if its gonna make everyone around you happy BUT YOU then no dont even think about it .. but if you believe its gonna be a good thing and your happy about it then i'm glad .. the thing is your gonna make her miserble as well .. cuz honstly i dont think your ready yet and you know why ..

well after all its up to , to either make the whole wrold happy and be sad yourself or try to make yourself happy and dont give a damn about anyone else .. no one is gonna live your life but yourself ..
La Reine said…
good luck, and mabrook, inshala it all works out hun
Anonymous said…
"Yes I want it not for my family but for me!
Yes I am ready to support family and 1 kid :)
I do have the urge!!"

When those things are true, a marriage can work. The person you are crazy for is NOT always the right person to be married to. Marriage is so much more, and you sound like you know that, and like you are ready.

I know you have been preparing financially - you are so ahead of the rest!

Good luck, Amu. I pray you are happily surprised with this girl, and I pray she has intelligence, compassion and insight as well as maturity, and sweet looks.
Anonymous said…
ge&b: lool at the shoes..well I will formals how is that? :P

navy girl: !!!TBD...

la reine: thanks :)

intlxpatr: Hey..thanks for the luck :)
falantan said…
Don't listen to anyone who tells you its a mistake. bel3aks. however you need to ask and know as much as possible. NO amount of information is too much. take your time and ask and ask, and make yourself available for her side to ask about you as well. marshal all your female family members to ask about her personality from close close friends of hers. Make sure your intellectual level agrees with you, as well as manners/moral standards level.

here's a tip, ask about how she treats il5adam belbait. sure-fire way. (and while you're at it, check how you treat them, you'll find out alot about yourself)

And I mean "agrees" with you, mo ya3ne tabeeha malaak o inta you know you're not that good. Sure you want to get better but you can both aspire to become better together, mako shai eyeek jahez, killa yabeela shughul :)

And make no mistake about this, this is for life. ya wailek in yet 3ogob cham sina o gelt mallait, tara ne3el fog rasek, aw ras'ha if she says it. You work it out. And you solve all problems with love.

O after all this bashing,

in kan lokom saale7 bhelzawaj, Allah ewafegkom :) o wakkel amrek killa l'Alla while doing everything you can.
I haven't read all the above posts and maybe they said this before.. but:
1.its only your first time and even if this doesn't work out.. there's always next time..
2. if you do not like the girl, don't say yes to please anyone because tathlem nafsik o tathlemha ma3ak.
3. do not base ur decision after the first time only..
4. you forget.. she may not like YOU ;p
5. good luck.. this is a life decision and you should always think and think and think and pray you will make the right choice
6. if all that doesn't work, then mail-order bride :D
Anonymous said…
Falantan: Welcome to blogsphere and thank you so much for leaving all the tips they will surely be helpful in the quest to find the perfect wife :)

hamitaf la bookay: thanks and lol @ the mail-order bride :)
Navy Girl said…
yeah yeah whatever bro :D
Mariposa said…
Not sure if my comment is wanted in this section...I know a little of your culture and how I love it, yet, a part of me is a bit apprehensive about arrange marriage...or is it like that here?

But I wish you all the best!
Ms Loala said…
Then good luck bro. Hope you all the best inshalla ;-)
Anonymous said… mate is getting married soon...mabroooooooook
F. said…
I can only imagine how nerve-wrecking this can be...big step indeed.
But if it turns out well, I bet it'll be the best thing ever!
Good luck.

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