Wednesday, September 12, 2007

3 days like 300 years

After 5 years for the first time for the past 3 days . . .

I didnt hear the word AMU

I didnt charge my phone battery till now

I didnt EAT

I didnt sleep well

I wake up with the slightest ring of my phone thinking its Pagli calling me

I keep waiting for her message but didnt receive any till now

I dont feel like working

I have prayed so much for her safety and happiness

I dunno what am I doing/I am not in my senses

I miss a hug *tears in my eyes*

I am not what I was . . .

Its hard to believe that all this has happened

I don't blame her for anything but I am really worried about her security and safety!

19 comments:

Navy Girl said...

but life goes on amu .. this is life .. i know its hard now .. but you will have to go on ..

Chroma-Trauma said...

Amu.. Don't stop living your life, just because what had happended. Look at our Prophet 'Ayoub', he lost his wife, kids and everything he had, even his own health. He didn't surrender to that crippling disease, he continued praying and praying. Life goes on and you should move on with your life Amu, no matter what. What happened is only a page of long chapter. If a chapter ended, it ended, you can't re-write what's already been written? Create a new page and start a new chapter ...

eshda3wa said...

awwww

i hate seeing you so broken hearted

its gonna get better inshallah

just hang in there

Amu said...

Thanks everyone for your comments...
but things just keep bugging me I sleep and then wake up in the middle of night thinking about her. Thinking does she still loves me the way i do? thinking is she ok? the only thing that really bugs me is her safety... I just pray that I want her to stay safe and happy where ever she is and both sisters stay together. As that was their mothers last wish before she passed away. Ameen

Oryx said...

Interruption


I want to believe fully in faith and let things be and be happy

I’m bothered, the feelings won’t let go

And the thoughts lingers in my head, no, in every cell that forms me

What can I do?

It’s so painful

And I start blaming my self

The only way to avoid it is to be busy, all the time, not a free minute so that the thoughts won’t creep back to me again, and they do

In my dreams, not for a single night I’d be left away, always with me

In my every thought

In my every memory

How can I go on?

But some how I do,

Time passes by

And I laugh though my laugh retreats by the thoughts and it carries a weight of guilt that drags me back


And days pass by, though full but to me they are empty

I keep saying, if it was meant to be,

But it looks like

It’s not

Anonymous said...

I dont know why i am saying this ... You will end up one of those happily ever after ... its just the testing time , it will only increase your love for her ... all you have to do is 'leave it to the ONE above ' He will work ways for you ...

again i dont know why i am saying it..

Amu said...

Enshallah I hope the same too... thanks for your support.

Shoush said...

I hope things get better for u soon. Inshala she's safe and happy. It's time for u to be safe and happy now. This is life; we don't always get wat we want, but we gotta learn to live with wat we hav. TC. :)

Amu said...

shoush: thanks for the kind words :) I hope this month brings happiness to both of us and keeps her safe always.

Intlxpatr said...

Tough times, Amu. Is there no way you can make a proposal for her, and be together legally?

Vixen said...

*hug* sorry to hear you're going through this, I hope she will be ok..

Amu said...

intlxpatr: well we can but the poor girl will face so much hard time as all the process and time that will take to process it legaly she will be mentally tortured by her family(aunty and step brother). Secondly we didnt want to go through the legal process cuz she still has a elder sister who is her late 20's and not married yet. If we do anything legally that will effect her elder sisters life in marriage and then again I have my family she doesnt have anyone except her sister. So its a tough life for her...I just hope Allah makes things easy for her.

vixen: I hope to!

Pearls said...

amuuu cheer up :( its ramadhan !! hope u feel better soon !

Maze said...

I'm sorry to hear all this and really feel bad..however i'll tell you to stay strong and never lose faith coz GOD will be by your side...take care man

Dynamic Deeds said...

Don't do this to urself, wallah 7aram!

I must admit it is a tough time, painful and hard but that doesn;t mean you punish urself like this.

Try to be positive, for the sake of it left to save of this relationship.
I say, wait and see....Time will only proof to u if this is love is meant to last or not.

Canc3riaN said...

Amu :( 3awwart galbi ... I'm also waiting and waiting and waiting like you.... you're waiting for her and i'm waiting for post with amazing news on your blog regarding this topic! Inshalla sooon we will get that positive post!!

I have a feeling that she's safe and secure.... but maybe the absense is because she's being watched by her family and she wants time to pass by until things loosen up a bit and then it would be easier for her to breath and contact you to let you know that things are fine.

We're by your side amu.
*hug*.... a warm one.

Sis 4 you said...

To al of you, who r Bro's friends and well wishers: He's getting better, he might not tell me everything while he's with me, nor I might be able to understand what everything he says. But I know one thing, each passing day n moment will be better, atleast a slightest bit better than the one before. As he gets over it, moment by moment and second by second, Inshallah it will be a happily ever after. Don't worry !

Sis 4 you said...

That's me holding my bro----->>>>>

Wild_Mare said...

sometimes life becomes so so cruel . it goes up and down. keep the faith and hold on your belief.

if you're meant to be together , she will come back to you . but in any case . I hope she's in safe and secure.

I know your pain takes time to heal . but I believe that you're strong enough to move on.